These walls I live inside Protect me from hatred and lies And these walls have made me strong But it's not where I belong I hear you knocking but can't let you in I don't know how it's gonna end But these walls, they set me free Kept me safe and sheltered me Here's where the road begins Got to reach out if I'm gonna win Gotta know how - I'm old enough now Never gonna feel this way again No, I'm never gonna hide behind these walls again +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | Daigakusei no Ranma | | | | Created by David Tai and Paul Gallegos | | | | Based on the characters created by Rumiko Takahashi | +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ =============================================================================== -= Episode 22: "Finals! Ranma in Jeopardy?" =- =============================================================================== [Morning at Maison Sabaku. Ranma sits at the table, hurriedly flipping through several notebooks at once while drinking from a large mug. Akane lounges at the desk, casually looking at a book and making notes every once in a while in a notebook.] Ranma: [to himself] Gregorian Reform was in the sixteenth century... 17 day skip in the calendar. Hmm. [writes down] Roman calendar starts on March 1... [writes down] Jesus Christ was born in 4 B.C., not 0 B.C. because of an error by the calendar's designer... hmm. [writes down] [A few minutes later, Ranma slams his pencil on the table and leans back in his chair.] Ranma: [sighs in frustration] I'm never gonna get through this! Akane: Relax. It's just finals. No big deal. Ranma: Easy for you to say! You're not the one in danger of failing three of your classes! Akane: You wouldn't have gotten so far behind if you hadn't had that silly obsession of beating Kuno in chess! Ranma: Remind me never to do that again. Akane: Nani? Miss that many classes? Ranma: No, lose to Kuno. [grins] [Akane smiles and shakes her head as Ranma returns to his cramming.] Akane: Did you remember to get your math notes from Ukyou? Ranma: [sighs loudly] HAI; I just haven't had time to go over there yet. Akane: Oh. Ranma: How many finals do _you_ have, anyway? Akane: Two written, two performance. Ranma: Oh, geez... how lucky can you get? Akane: I've already done the freshman classes, remember? Ranma: Yeah, yeah. [The phone rings.] Akane: [picking up handset] Moshi moshi! [pause] Ah! Kanrinin-san! [pause] Nani? No hot water? [sighs] Arigato. Ja! [hangs up phone] Ranma: What'd she say about the hot water? Akane: They will be working on the water heater all day tomorrow. Ranma: [sighs] Great. So what about baths before my finals? Akane: You'll just have to deal with cold baths. [pauses, then smiles] And with being a girl all day. Ranma: How about having to TAKE my finals as a girl? Don't you think the exam proctors will get a little suspicious if a girl hands in Saotome Ranma's final? Akane: Oh! I didn't think about it like that. [pauses] I guess you're right. Maybe you should go to the gym tomorrow before your finals and take a shower there. I doubt the university will run out of hot water. Ranma: Good point. I'll have to do that. [looks around] What time is it? Akane: It's... [looks at watch] almost 10:00 am. Ranma: Oh joy. I guess I should get over to Ukyou's and get the math notes. Akane: What time will you be back? Ranma: [blinks] Uh... I dunno. Why do you ask? Akane: Just wondering. Murata-san asked if we'd participate in an experiment for her. Ranma: Well, in that case, next week. Akane: [sticks out tongue] It's a _written_ experiment. After her last run-in with the Noumunoikan administration, she's not allowed to do any experiments that involve chemicals. So she's turning in a psychology report on married couples for her final paper. Ranma: Are you sure there's NO chance of her using that strength potion again or doing something just as crazy? Akane: Absolutely! [under her breath] Sort of. Ranma: [sighs] All right, I'll be home around 2:00. [Ranma gets up and gathers all his books and notes. Walking over to the door, he opens it and straps on his backpack.] Akane: Just meet me at Kasumi-oneechan's apartment at 2:00. Ranma: [nods] Hai. See you then. [smiles] Mata ne! [Ranma closes the door behind himself. Akane watches the door for a while, then goes back to her studying.] * * * [Outside Ukyou's apartment, Ranma climbs the stairs slowly, looking at his feet. He stops in front of apartment 106 and raises his hand to knock.] Megami: Uncle Ranchan!! [Ranma is ambushed by Megami, who flies out the door and attaches herself to him. Megami looks like she is in her early teens, though a hint of her boyish figure remains.] Ranma: Urk... Me... Megami-chan... can't... breathe... Megami: Oh! [disengages herself] How are you, Uncle Ranchan? Ukyou: [from inside] Megami! Who's outsi.. [brightens] Ranchan! Come in! I've been expecting you! [Ranma straightens out his shirt and takes a big breath.] Ranma: Sure. [walks inside] Megami: [smiles at Ranma] Would you like something to drink? Ranma: How about some soda? [rumpling her hair] Megami: Uncle Ranchan! I'm not a little girl anymore! Ranma: Yeah... I guess not. Megami: [blushing and backing away] Umm... I'll be right back! [bounces into kitchen] [Ranma and Ukyou exchange glances, then both shake their heads.] Ukyou: Gomen, Ranchan... she can be a bit much sometimes. Ranma: Well, at least she's not glowing. Still growing though. Ukyou: I know, but she seems to be slowing down. Ranma: Uh huh. Anyway, I'm here to pick up some notes. Ukyou: Right! Did you get everything from the review session? Ranma: [grumpily] Written down, hai. Understood, iie. Ukyou: Cheer up, Ranchan. With my help, you'll pass. [grins] [Megami returns with three glasses of soda, giving one to Ranma and one to Ukyou. She sits on the floor next to him and sips her own soda, listening quietly and watching.] Ranma: I hope so. I'm in danger of failing almost all my classes. Ukyou: Well, y'know, if you hadn't had that silly obsession of beating Kuno... Ranma: [sighs] I get the feeling I've heard this before... [grins] Ukyou: [giggles] Ok, where should we begin? Megami: Uncle Ranchan? Why are you failing? I thought you did well at everything... [Ranma turns bright red and shoots Ukyou a "What did you tell her?" look.] Ranma: [stammers] Well, uh... you see... it's like this... Megami: You were having a bad day? Ranma: Yeah! That's it! I was having a bad day. Ukyou: [rolling her eyes, speaking under her breath] Several of them. In a row. * * * Akane: [incredulous] She did what? Ranma: You heard me. She ran up and hugged me at the door. [grins] She looks like a teen already and is starting to act like one as well. [Ranma and Akane continue up the street toward Kasumi and Yuriko's apartment.] Akane: [shakes head] Wow. I had no idea. [looks at Ranma] You don't think it's _strange_ for her to be acting like that toward you? Ranma: Well, not re-... HEY! What're you saying? Akane: Nothing! Just wondering if it's something that we should be worried about. You know... younger girl, older guy... Ranma: I can't see what harm... HEY! Akane: [laughs] Relax, Casanova, I'm just saying that you should probably pay closer attention when you're around her. Ranma: I guess. [shrugs] I don't think it's really a big deal anyway. Akane: Neither do I, but you never know. Ranma: Speaking of not knowing, do you know what this whole experiment of Yuriko's is about? Akane: Do you remember when I was answering a bunch of questions for her? Ranma: Vaguely. Akane: I have a feeling that this is the experiment that she was talking about. Ranma: [grimaces] Do I have to go? Akane: Kasumi asked us. Yuriko needs a married couple to do this on, and we're the only ones that she knows that live close to her. Ranma: Couldn't she just call her parents or something? They're married, ne? Akane: I don't know. I guess she could've, but she was pretty insistent on us. Besides, I think it'd be fun. Ranma: [blinks] This is your idea of fun? Akane: It is when I've got a wish to use. Ranma: You finally decided to use that last wish, eh? Akane: [nods] Un. And guess what I'm wishing for... Ranma: [sighs] Ok, ok... I'm going. [The two reach the courtyard and see Kasumi waiting downstairs for them.] Kasumi: Ah, Akane! Ranma! Konnichiwa! Akane: Kasumi-oneechan! Konnichiwa! [smiles] We're not late, are we? Kasumi: No, no... you're right on time. Yuriko is upstairs waiting for you. Ranma: [to himself] There's a scary thought. Akane: Ok, we'll go right up, then. Is Nabiki also coming over? Ranma: [bristling] Is she part of the experiment too? Akane: Not that I know of... I just had something to ask her before we go back to Nerima. Kasumi: [smiles] No, Nabiki has other things to attend to today. [Ranma breathes a small sigh of relief, and Akane looks quizzically at him.] Ranma: Well, how long do you think this'll take? I need to study _sometime_ today. Kasumi: I don't think Yuriko's experiment will take that long. I already went over it once with her and helped her with some parts. [Ranma and Akane turn and look at Kasumi, jaws agape.] Akane and Ranma: You helped Yuriko? Kasumi: Hai! [smiles] [Shrugging, the two enter the apartment and walk upstairs, Kasumi following right behind.] Yuriko: [inside lab] Kasumi? Are they here yet? Akane: [loudly] Hai. We're here. [Yuriko comes rushing out and smiles broadly.] Yuriko: You don't know how happy I am to see you! You're my only shot at a decent grade in this class! Ranma: Hey now, no more chemicals! You promised! Yuriko: I swear, no chemicals involved! It's just a question and answer session, honest! Akane: Really? On what? Yuriko: Dysfunctional family units and marriages, of course! [gasps] Oops! I wasn't supposed to tell you that! [Ranma and Akane face-fault.] * * * [Choji adjusts several control knobs on a monitor while munching on a piece of toast. After a minute or two, the picture becomes clearer, showing the interior of one of Maison Sabaku's apartments. The walls are adorned with pictures of pandas and kittens, and two tall bookshelves are filled with small novels. Two doors can be seen, though one only partially. However, the one that can be seen clearly leads to...] Choji: [low whistle] The bedroom. [smiles] I didn't think I could get it set up right, but it works! [claps hands] Oh! The VCR! I forgot! [Choji grabs a VCR and begins to add it to the mass of circuitry and wiring. Meanwhile, on the screen, Hitomi walks out of one door wrapped in a towel and enters the bedroom.] Choji: [noticing movement on screen] AAA! Chikusho! [to VCR] Hurry up! [Choji turns on the VCR as Hitomi begins to unwrap the towel. However, the lights go out in her apartment. Movement in the darkness can be seen faintly, as Hitomi walks over to the door.] Hitomi: [yelling from downstairs] Kanrinin-san! [pauses] Kanrinin-san! Toshi: [yelling from upstairs] She's gone shopping! Hitomi: [yelling] Gomen! Choji: [muttering] Chikusho! Hurry up and find your fuse already! [More movement on screen, then lights start to come on in different parts of the apartment. The light above the camera, however, does not. Hitomi again appears on screen and moves a chair underneath the light, standing on it to reach the fixture. She removes the burnt-out bulb and is placing a new one in the socket when suddenly the camera-angle drops to the floor.] Choji: [realizing] Oh... no... [There is a long pause as Choji watches the monitor, hearing footsteps pound up the stairs.] Hitomi: [yelling from downstairs] CHOJI!! HENTAI!! [Choji quickly shuts down his monitors and VCRs. Disconnecting the power cords, he shoves the entire bench back into a specially-made cabinet which closes and locks automatically. He presses a button on another remote control, and a small red light appears above the cabinet. Satisfied, he stuffs the remote in his pocket and makes for the window as he hears footsteps running up the stairs toward his room.] Hitomi: [pounding on Choji's door] HENTAI!! OPEN UP! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE! Choji: [to himself] Not a chance, babe. [He opens the window and heads for the roof, closing it behind him. He climbs down the tree and, reaching the ground, brushes himself off at the bottom. Turning around with a smile, he sees Hitomi standing there, clad in a bathrobe, an angry expression on her face.] Choji: Uh oh... * * * [Akane and Ranma sit in chairs opposite Yuriko, who sits on her bed with a pad of paper and several pens. Ranma looks nervously at Akane, who merely shrugs with an "I don't know either" look.] Ranma: So... Murata-san... what are we going to be doing? Yuriko: Oh, it's simple really. I'm just going to ask you some questions that I had asked Akane earlier and see if your responses match. Ranma: Oh! That's not so bad. [looks at Akane] I think I can handle this. [Akane, however, looks at the floor, not saying anything.] Yuriko: Ok, here's the first question: What would you say is your best feature? Ranma: [blinks] Uh.. I'd say my body. I keep in shape. [grins] Yuriko: Hmm. Akane said your eyes. [Ranma, surprised, looks at Akane, who in turn looks at the window and begins to whistle.] Yuriko: Ok, next question: Where's the most romantic place you've ever been together? Ranma: [sweat drop begins to form] Um... maybe Prince Toma's island, I guess. Yuriko: She said the Haunted Forest. [makes some marks on paper] Ranma: Oh. [looks at Akane again] Yuriko: Next: If you were to have children, would you want a boy or a girl first? [All of the color drains out of Ranma's face.] Ranma: [slowly] ch... ch... children? Yuriko: Hai. Boy or girl? Ranma: [looking at Akane helplessly] b... boy? Yuriko: Good! You got that one right. [writes down] [Ranma looks immediately at his feet and turns a bright red.] Yuriko: All right... When was the last time you two had sex? Ranma: NANI?! [Ranma glances at Akane, who finds her nails to be very interesting at the moment.] Yuriko: When. As in time and place? Ranma: [nervously] When you say "had sex", do you mean...? [Akane looks at the floor.] Yuriko: [interrupting] I'll take that as a "never"... [writes down] Y'know... [chews on pen] being married and not... Hmm. That's probably worth some extra research... [looks at Ranma] I mean, don't you two want to? Ranma: ... Akane: ... Yuriko: [looks at watch] Ah, we don't have time to get into that anyway. Che. Ok, next one: What do you fear most? Ranma: [exhales slowly] Fear? Me? Nothing. [A sound, similar to a guffaw, comes from Akane's direction.] Yuriko: [shakes head] C'mon, this is me, Yuriko! You can tell me! [lowers voice] Besides, everyone has at least one fear... Ranma: [slowly] We-ll, you could say I'm... I'm afraid of c- cats. [Akane cringes, looking over at Ranma.] Yuriko: I meant about Akane. Ranma: [blinks] Oh! Um, I don't really fear her, I guess. Maybe just her cooking sometimes... [Akane coughs and looks away.] Yuriko: Correct. [enthusiastically] That's two you got right, Ranma! You're getting better at this! Ranma: [blinks] Really. Yuriko: Yep. I only have a few more questions to ask you two... [Yuriko gets up off the bed and walks over to her desk, where a tall stack of paper sits. She lifts the stack of papers, and Ranma and Akane face-fault, then fall backward off their chairs.] Yuriko: Nani? I just needed a paperclip... * * * [Akane and Ranma walk up the path to Maison Sabaku as the sun is setting in the west. Every so often, Ranma works up the courage to look up at Akane, who is steadfastly ignoring him. Eventually, though, she turns to look back.] Akane: [angrily] I can't believe you only got four questions right. Ranma: How was I supposed to know she was going to ask those kinds of questions? [pauses] I think she's a little strange, if you ask me. And why did she ask all those questions afterwards? Akane: [smiles] I think she needed some more information for her report. She asked me a ton of questions afterwards as well. [shrugs] Ranma: [sighs] Tell me again why we're doing this when it's obviously on dysfunctional families? Akane: [slowly] We-ll, mostly because we're helping Yuriko out, and partly because I was kind of curious as to what you'd say to some of those questions. Ranma: Oh... you mean like the cooking and stuff. Akane: Not exactly. [looks away] Ranma: Well, what did you me... [realization] Oh! That! [Ranma turns red and looks away. The two walk in silence the rest of the way back to Maison Sabaku. When they reach the gate, Ranma opens it for Akane to walk through. There, they see Choji hogtied to the tree, blindfolded, with a note that says "HENTAI! DO NOT UNTIE!" pinned to his shirt. The two stop and stare for several minutes, then begin laughing. At the sound of their voices, Choji's head straightens up, and he begins squirming against the ropes.] Choji: Hey! Whoever you are! Help! Untie me! Help! Ranma: [looks at Akane] Should we? Akane: Oh, help him out. He's probably cold. Ranma: [chuckling] Ok ok. [kneels down] Stop squirming, Choji-san. I'm trying to untie you. [pauses] I don't know who did this, but whoever it was sure knows how to tie a knot! Akane: [mixed concern and laughter] Are you all right, Ketibeppu-san? [Ranma finishes untying Choji. Choji immediately rips the blindfold from his face.] Choji: [angrily] No! I'm not all right! And I'm going to get her for this! [mutters] Stupid waitress has no sense of humor whatsoever. Ranma and Akane: "Her"? Ranma: [incredulously] A girl tied you up? [The two try to stifle their laughter, succeeding in chortling instead. Choji, seeing the two not moving, walks upstairs in a huff, slamming the door.] Akane: [giggling] I wonder what he did? Ranma: Somehow, I don't wanna know. Akane: Neither do I. [motions] C'mon, I've got some studying to do before tomorrow still. Ranma: [sighs] Yeah, me too. [The two walk up the steps to the front door. Ranma lets Akane enter first, then shuts the door.] Ranma: [to himself] Hogtied to the tree. I wonder who he got so angry to do something like that... [trails off] [As he passes Hitomi's door, he looks at it thoughtfully.] Ranma: Nah... couldn't be. * * * [Ranma sits at the table in Room 4, hurriedly flipping through several books at once while madly scribbling notes in a notebook. Akane sits at the desk, casually looking at a book and making notes every once in a while in a small notebook.] Ranma: [sighs in frustration] I'm never gonna get through this! Akane: Relax. It's just finals. No big deal. [A knock is heard at the door.] Akane: I'll get it. [gets up] [Akane swiftly crosses the room and opens the door to reveal Toshi.] Toshi: Hey you two, I just wanted to stop by and ask if you wanted some lemons from the tree outside. [to Akane] I heard from Furuya-san that you're trying more and more new dishes lately, and since I was gathering the lemons... Akane: [smiles] Hai! I could use a couple of lemons! Arigato! [Toshi grabs several HUGE bags from outside the doorway and gives them to Akane, who is pulled to the ground by the weight.] Toshi: No problem! Thanks for taking them off my hands! [Clapping his hands together to dust them off, he turns and walks down the hall toward Room 6. Akane struggles to lift the enormous bags, then shuts the door. Ranma has been watching with some amusement.] Ranma: Need some help? Akane: [puffs] I'm ... just .. fine... thanks. Ranma: Ok... [Akane lumbers into the kitchen. Ranma turns back to his books, but before he can write anything, another knock on the door is heard.] Ranma: Nani? [gets up] [He opens the door and sees Kazuyo standing in the doorway.] Ranma: Kanrinin-san! What can I do for you? Kazuyo: Oh, I was just going to ask if you have seen or heard anything strange this afternoon? The neighbors were complaining about some weird noises coming from Maison Sabaku earlier today. Ranma: Um... [recalls Choji and the tree] Noooo, I don't remember anything strange. Then again, Akane and I were at her sister's for the better part of the day. Kazuyo: Oh, all right then. [smiles] I'll go and ask Akiyama-san in a bit. Ranma: No problem. [begins to close the door] Kazuyo: By the way, did you get any lemons from the trees outside? Ranma: [stops] Um, Yamakawa-san just dropped off a couple of big bags of them. Kazuyo: [softly] So that's what he did with them. Ranma: Is there a problem? Kazuyo: No, I think he's just angry because I beat him in our weekly game of shogi. Ranma: Oh. [nods] Kazuyo: Well, anyway, I must go downstairs and talk to Akiyama-san. Have a good night! Ranma: Arigato gozaimasu! [Ranma closes the door, shaking his head.] Akane: [from kitchen] Who was it? Ranma: [loudly] Kanrinin-san. She wanted to know if we saw anything strange this afternoon. Akane: [exiting kitchen] Did you tell her about Choji? Ranma: Why? It wasn't THAT strange... [Another knock is heard at the door. Both Akane and Ranma look at each other quizzically.] Ranma: Nani? Is this Tokyo Station? [opens door] Choji: Hey, I just wanted to say "Arigato" for not telling Kanrinin-san about this afternoon. Here. [gives Ranma a videotape] A present. Ranma: Well, geez... Choji: Gotta go. Ja! [Choji disappears back into his apartment, leaving Ranma staring at the video in his hands.] Ranma: [turning to Akane] Look what Choji gave us. [holds up video and closing door] A video. No label though. Akane: Hmm. I wonder what's on it. Ranma: I don't know. I just said it doesn't have a label. Akane: Oh! Right. [Another knock on the door.] Ranma: Okaaaay. [Ranma opens the door to see Choji there again.] Choji: Sorry, gave you the wrong tape. [He grabs the tape out of Ranma's hands and shoves another one in them. This one is labeled "A Clockwork Orange". He then scurries quickly back to Room 3. Ranma is left standing in the doorway, blinking.] Akane: I take it it was the wrong tape. Ranma: Right. [closing door] Akane: [looking at tape] "A Clockwork Orange". Ranma: At least it's not another lemon... [trails off] [Akane and Ranma stop and look at each other for a few moments.] Ranma: [looks at tape] Besides, how the heck are we supposed to play it without a VCR anyway? [Akane shrugs. Ranma tosses the tape in the corner, then walks back to his table.] Akane: I'm going to start dinner. Lemon pepper chicken sound good? Ranma: Why do I get the feeling that food for the next couple of weeks will have lemons in it? Akane: [sticks out tongue] I don't know. Maybe because you're psychic? Ranma: Whatever. [goes back to studying] [A knock is heard at the door. Ranma tosses his pencil in the air and gets up to answer the door. At the door is Hitomi with a towel in her hands.] Hitomi: Konbanwa! I came to return Akane's towel! Akane: A towel? I don't remember giving you a towel. Are you sure it's ours? Hitomi: [looks confused] I could've sworn it was yours... I don't own one like this... Ranma: Are you sure it's not Sato-san's? Hitomi: Oh! You're right! Silly me! Gomen! [Hitomi bounces next door and knocks on the door.] Ranma: Um, I have a feeling that he's not home. Hitomi: How do you know that? Ranma: He's the only one that hasn't come by yet. * * * [The next morning, Ranma awakens before Akane and goes into the bathroom with a towel. A bloodcurling scream is heard moments later.] Ranma-chan: COLD!! COLD!! COLD!! Akane: [startled, half-asleep] Wha? Ranma? [rubs eyes] Ranma? What's wrong? Ranma-chan: [running out of bathroom] There's no hot water! It's cold! Akane: [not amused] I told you that yesterday. They're fixing it today, remember? [flops back into bed] Put a towel on or something. You're dripping all over the place. Ranma-chan: [mutters] Great... I don't want to take finals like this. Akane: [mumbling] Go warm a tea kettle or something. Ranma-chan: [blinks] Oh yeah! Good idea! [Ranma-chan goes back into the bathroom and finishes her morning bath with occasional hushed yelps and chattering of teeth. She exits minutes later, wrapped in a towel, and walks into the kitchen. Soon, the tea kettle's whistle can be heard.] Akane: [getting up] It's done, Ranma. [louder] Ranma? [She enters the kitchen to see Ranma-chan leaning against the refrigerator, asleep and snoring quietly. Rubbing her eyes sleepily, she takes the tea kettle off the stove. She pours some out in the sink, yawning as she watches the steam rise quickly. She raises it above Ranma-chan's head, then stops and looks over at the sink thoughtfully. She pours about half of the water out of the kettle, then adds some cold water to it. After testing it on her wrist, she turns and dumps the entire thing on Ranma-chan.] Ranma: YEEEOW!! HOT!! HOT!! HOT!! [bouncing around kitchen] Akane: [tiredly] Don't be a baby, it wasn't that hot. [replaces kettle on stove] Be glad I didn't pour it on you when it was first done. [She yawns and returns to bed. Ranma watches her for a moment or two, then smiles and goes into the bathroom. A few minutes later, he comes out dressed and begins to clear off the table, stuffing all his books and notes into his backpack.] Ranma: [zipping up backpack] Hey, Akane, don't you have any finals today? Akane: [mumbling] mgxpslnntq Ranma: [louder] I said, don't you have any finals today? Akane: [bolting upright] Huh? Wha? [looking at alarm clock blearily] I have a final at 11:00am. I need sleep. Leave me alone. [She falls back in bed grumpily.] Ranma: Che. Excuse me for wondering. [He leaves the apartment as quietly as possible and walks downstairs. Hitomi also exits her apartment as he reaches the first floor. He notices that she is wearing a smart but fashionable business suit and high heels.] Hitomi: [brightly] Ohayo, Ranma-kun! Ranma: [smiles] Ohayo! Hitomi: You look like you're headed for classes, ne? Ranma: Hai. I've got a couple of finals today. Where are you going? Hitomi: Job interview. [clasps hands together] I'm trying to get a secretarial job over at the new office complex by the hospital. [smiles and sighs] They do graphic design, and it's SO cool! I want to get this job so badly! Ranma: Well, ganbatte ne! I'm outta here. [waves] Hitomi: Ganbatte ne, Ranma-kun. Do well on your finals! [as she leaves] Oh, if you're interested, I heard that there's going to be a big party at the Nekohanten sometime soon. Don't know when, but I'll let you know when I find out! Ranma: [calling after her] Sounds good! [Hitomi and Ranma head off in opposite directions, Hitomi toward the bus stop, Ranma toward the Mizunoikan campus. He begins to jog along easily, but halfway there, he encounters a construction site where the sidewalk is fenced off. He comes to a halt in front of a burly construction worker wearing a yellow hard hat. The sidewalk is torn up, and several men are in a shallow ditch, digging a trench. The worker in the hat motions toward the other side of the street.] Construction worker: Sumimasen! Please use the sidewalk on the other side of the street. [bows] Ranma: [sighs] Hai. [Ranma begins to cross when several workers swarm out of the site yelling and screaming.] Worker: [yelling] Look out! It's gonna blow! Ranma: [blinks] Nani? [An underground water main bursts, sending a spray of water several feet into the air. The ground immediately gives way, and a large sinkhole appears, swallowing parked cars and several passersby. Ranma is immediately soaked to the skin but instinctively reacts to the destruction, jumping into the sinkhole and landing on the hood of a damaged car. Ranma-chan then helps pull people to safety on top of the car. Minutes pass. One of the construction workers manages to lower a chain into the hole, enabling the trapped people to climb out, with Ranma-chan helping. As she finally climbs out, making sure no one else is trapped in the sinkhole, she notices the swarm of reporters waiting for her, with TV cameras approaching quickly.] Reporter: You just saved the lives of seven people! Why'd you do it? Ranma-chan: What time is it? Reporter: [blinks] It's, uh... 8:40am. Ranma-chan: Can't talk right now. I've got to get to campus for my final. Reporter: You've got to do what?? Ranma-chan: My final. If I'm late, I don't pass. [starts to push through the reporters] Excuse me. Pardon me. Coming through. [Leaving the host of TV and newspaper reporters behind, Ranma-chan sprints off toward campus. Her wallet, however, refuses to go along and falls out. A TV reporter scoops it up excitedly.] TV Reporter: Her name is Saotome Ranma. [squints at Mizunoikan photo ID] Wow, this picture is AWFUL! She almost looks like a boy here. [shows cameraman] Let's see if we can't make a composite from our footage and this picture. [The cameraman nods and the two head off to a nearby TV station van parked close by.] * * * [Ranma-chan arrives in the classroom and sits down breathlessly just as the bell rings. The teaching assistant, satisfied that everyone is in the room, locks the door and begins handing out exams. Ranma-chan looks to her left but the familiar face of Hiroe Mizuta is not there.] Ranma-chan: [sighing inwardly] Maybe she's taking it at a different time. [She scans the exam quickly, then writes her name at the top and begins. Fifteen minutes into the exam, the teaching assistant walks over to Ranma-chan and stands next to her desk.] Ranma-chan: [whispering] Nan desu ka? Teaching Assistant: [whispering] You are...? Ranma-chan: [whispering] Saotome Ranma. [The teaching assistant looks bewildered for a moment, then grabs the exam off of Ranma-chan's desk. Ranma-chan only sighs in frustration and trudges up to the front of the classroom with the teaching assistant.] Teaching Assistant: [whispering] Saotome Ranma, eh? I don't remember you in class when I lectured a couple of weeks ago. Ranma-chan: [whispering] That was last month, ne? I wasn't able to attend during that time. I had a... [remembers Kuno's chess challenge] bit of a crisis at the time. Teaching Assistant: [whispering] Oh really. Ranma-chan: My name is on the roll sheet if you don't believe me. [The teaching assistant checks the roll sheet and finds Ranma's name listed. However, she isn't about to give up so easily.] Teaching Assistant: [whispering] I'm not sure I believe you're Saotome Ranma though. Do you have your ID with you? Ranma-chan: [blinks] ID? [pats back pocket] Sur... wait. Where's my wallet? Teaching Assistant: [smirks] I see. Ranma-chan: [whispering] I had it this morning! Teaching Assistant: [whispering] Well, the dean might have something to say to you as well. Ranma-chan: [whispering loudly] Hey, before you go off making assumptions, you might want to at least check the handwriting. You still have my last two homework assignments. Check the two with my exam. [The teaching assistant glowers but compares the handwriting anyway. After a moment, her face pales and she stands up slowly.] Teaching Assistant: [whisperings] So... Saotome-san, I'm afraid that I've made a bit of a mistake... Ranma-chan: [whispering loudly] You're damn right you have. I've half a mind to report you to the professor for this! You've made me waste fifteen minutes of exam time when I could've been answering questions. Now I'll be lucky to finish half of the exam! Teaching Assistant: [whispering] No, no... you can have all the time you need to finish. No hurry. Please go back and sit down. No need to worry at all. Ranma-chan: [sighs] Hai. Domo. [The teaching assistant nods and bows several times before Ranma-chan returns to her seat.] Ranma-chan: [smirks inwardly] Well, whaddya know? I can take my time after all ... This ain't turning out to be so bad. * * * [Hours later, the classroom is empty except for Ranma-chan sitting in the last row, chewing on his pencil, and the teaching assistant sitting patiently at the front of the room, trying not to stare.] Ranma-chan: [thinking] Well, I guess that's about all I can answer. Teaching Assistant: Anou... Ranma-chan: [getting up] Hai? Teaching Assistant: No no... if you're not done yet, please continue! Ranma-chan: [walking towards front of room] No, I'm done. [The teaching assistant sighs visibly and begins to put all the finals into her briefcase.] Ranma-chan: [handing test to teaching assistant] This was a tough one, but I think I did ok. [The teaching assistant looks over Ranma-chan's exam and notices that one of the questions is not answered.] Teaching Assistant: [sweat drop forms] You realize that you did not answer question seven? Ranma-chan: [nods] Hai. It asked for a summary and discussion on Asuki's _Sakura and Sake_... Teaching Assistant: [interrupting] I assume you didn't read it? Ranma-chan: [continuing] But at the beginning of the exam, it also says that if a question pertains to your project, you can skip it. [pauses] I assume you didn't read Mizuta-san's and my project? Teaching Assistant: [blinks] oh. Ranma-chan: [grins] Ja, I've got another final. Mata ne. [Ranma-chan exits the classroom, leaving the teaching assistant to stare at her paper in bewilderment.] * * * [Outside the building, Makiko and Lardizabal sit on the landing in front of a hardly used side door pouring over several notebooks.] Makiko: So, if you take the integral here [points] and take its limit here [points] you get "y". Then, substitute "y" into the original equation and plug-n-chug. Lardizabal: [goggles] Uh, sure. I get it. Makiko: Are you sure? Lardizabal: [nods] Really! Makiko: Good. [turns page] Now, as for problem 43... Lardizabal: [interrupting] You know, I've been meaning to ask you what you're doing over break? Makiko: [blinks] Me? Um... [stuttering] I.. I don't know. Lardizabal: Well, you see... there's this wedding I'm going to... it's a family thing, but I can invite anyone I want. Makiko: Really? [frowns] But I'll be meeting your family... so soon? Are you sure? Lardizabal: Uh... [hand behind head] Actually, it's not THAT big of a deal, I mean... you don't have to go if you don't want to. Makiko: We-ll... Lardizabal: [continuing] I mean, if I don't bring anyone, it's ok. Just that during one part of the ceremony, the family pairs people up with their dates and they do this dance... Makiko: Cool! Dancing and music and a wedding. It sounds fun! When is it? Lardizabal: Well.. heh, um, you see... [Ranma-chan exits the building, opening the door and sending Lardizabal flying into the bushes.] Ranma-chan: Ah! Sumimase... Lardizabal? Lardizabal: [from bushes] ... Makiko: [getting up quickly] Oi! Watch what you're doing, you little... Lardizabal: [interrupting] Hey! I haven't seen you since ... [glowers] since the play. Ranma-chan: [laughs nervously] Well, you know... the building... I had to ... Makiko: [interrupting] Lard-chan! Lardizabal: Oh! [grins] Where are my manners? [gestures to Makiko] This is... um... [trails off] Makiko: [fuming] Kawamura Makiko. Ranma-chan: I kno.. er, [bows slightly] I mean, it is good to meet you. I am Saotome [remembering last encounter with Lardizabal] Ranko. Lardizabal: [blinks] Saotome... Makiko: [blinks] Are you related to Saotome Ranma? Ranma-chan: [smiles] Everyone asks me that. He must be a pretty popular guy. Lardizabal: Well, I wouldn't go that far... [Ranma-chan frowns.] Makiko: Ranma-kun is nice, Lard-chan. [elbows him] Ranma-chan: Anyway, I've got to get going. Lardizabal: Are you going to get lunch right now? [Makiko glares at Lardizabal. Ranma-chan notices this and smirks.] Ranma-chan: No, I have another final in about 15 minutes. Gotta go. Ja! [Ranma-chan walks off, listening to Makiko thwap Lardizabal several times with a book.] * * * [Ranma-chan walks into the classroom as the teacher unveils a HUGE board with six columns and six rows on it. The teacher sits at his desk and presses a button on a laptop. The board immediately lights up, the bottom five rows having numbers on them ranging from '10' to '50'. Ranma-chan looks around the room at the students' reaction, but each is sitting stolidly in a desk, a buzzer in hand. She then sees that the classroom has been divided into six rows of desks, the first two having blue pieces of paper taped to the desktop, the second two having white paper, and the last two having red.] Ranma-chan: What the...? Teacher: [to Ranma-chan] Take your seat, and we'll begin. [Ranma-chan finds a seat near the back of one of the white rows and holds her buzzer in her lap.] Teacher: [loudly] As you know, you voted for the type of exam we would have. [gestures to the board] This is the result. If you haven't already noticed, I've divided the classroom into three teams, team one being the blue desks, team two the white, and team three the red. [points to buzzers] The device that you hold, when pressed, will light up, and a spotlight [points to top of board] will automatically light up the correct team. Your final grade for the semester will be based on the amount of points your team gets, which means that this 'final' is worth 100% of your grade. The highest team will all receive an A, the second place team a B, and the third place team a C. [pauses] Basically, the only way to FAIL this class is by not showing up today. The exam will take a total of about thirty minutes. [Ranma-chan breathes a loud sigh of relief, causing her teammates to snicker quietly.] Teacher: Are you ready to begin? Let's play! Our categories today are: "European History," "US History," "Historical Figures," "Dates," "Ancient Geography," and finally, "Jackie Chan." Team one, you get to select first. Team 1 Student: European History for 10. Teacher: This war was sometimes called the War of Jenkin's Ear. [Team 3 buzzes in.] Team 3 Student: What is the War of Austrian Succession? Teacher: Correct. [Ranma-chan looks around the room and sighs. She notices that most of her teammates are either students who hardly ever showed up for class or students who never paid attention in class.] Ranma-chan: [to herself] If all the exam questions are like this, we're gonna fail... * * * [Fifteen minutes later, Team 3 has posted a sizable lead. Team 1 is lagging only slightly behind, while Team 2 trails miserably.] Ranma-chan: [thinking] Well, at least I get a C out of it. But for once I'd like to get an A in something... Team 3 Student: European History for 50. Teacher: This is the month that Russians celebrate the October Revolution. [Team 3 buzzes in.] Team 3 Student: What is October? Teacher: No, I'm sorry. [There is a VERY long pause. Then, Ranma-chan buzzes in.] Ranma-chan: Um... what is November? Teacher: Correct. [Ranma-chan's teammates smile and nod at her.] Ranma-chan: Um... Jackie Chan for 10. Teacher: He was the legendary Chinese folklore hero played by Jackie Chan in "Drunken Master" and "Drunken Master II". [Ranma-chan buzzes in.] Ranma-chan: Who is Wong Fei Hung? Teacher: Correct. Ranma-chan: [more confident] Jackie Chan for 20. Teacher: The movie Jackie Chan cracked his skull open during filming. [Ranma-chan buzzes in.] Ranma-chan: What is "Armour of God"? Teacher: Correct. Ranma-chan: [excited] Jackie Chan for 30. Teacher: "Supercop" and "First Strike" are parts three and four of this series. [Ranma-chan buzzes in.] Ranma-chan: What is "Police Story"? Teacher: Correct. Ranma-chan: [bouncing] Jackie Chan for 40. Teacher: Jackie Chan's directorial debut. [Ranma-chan buzzes in.] Ranma-chan: What is "Dragonlord"? Teacher: Correct. Ranma-chan: Jackie Chan for 50. Teacher: Rounding out the category... This movie had Jackie Chan attempt to stop a motorcycle race in his underwear. [Ranma-chan buzzes in.] Ranma-chan: [loudly] What is "Rumble in the Bronx"? Teacher: Correct. [All of Ranma-chan's teammates give her a standing ovation. Team 2 has managed to pull within 90 points of Team 3. Ranma-chan notices to her dismay that only four questions remain on the board, two in Dates, and one each in Historical ] Figures and US History.] Teacher: There is less than a minute to go. Ranma-chan: Um... oh geez, how about US History for 50 then. Teacher: Ironically, Arlington National Cemetary is on land that once was owned by this man. [Team 3 buzzes in.] Team 3 Student: Who was Robert E. Lee? Teacher: Correct. [Team 2 sighs collectively, as Team 3 is now 140 points ahead and clearly out of reach.] Team 3 Student: Historical Figures for 50. Teacher: He was the heaviest president of the United States. [Team 1 buzzes in.] Team 1 Student: Who was Cleveland? Teacher: No, I'm sorry. [The student in front of Ranma-chan suddenly decides to pound on his buzzer.] Team 2 Student: Um... uh... who was Taft? Teacher: Correct. [All the team members around the student slap him on the back. He looks up at the only remaining category to decide on a question.] Team 2 Student: Uh... hmm... Ranma-chan: [whispering loudly] Dates for 40. Team 2 Student: Oh yeah! Dates for 40. Teacher: Pakistan's Independence Day. [Team 1 buzzes in.] Team 1 Student: What is July 4, 1776? [His teammates immediately descend on him.] Teacher: No, I'm sorry. [Ranma-chan sighs. The same team member in front of her hits his buzzer again. Ranma-chan blinks in surprise.] Team 2 Student: What is August 14, 1947? Teacher: Correct. [Most of the members of Team 2 faint in utter surprise. They can now tie Team 3 if they answer the last question correctly.] Teacher: And the last question is our daily double. [The rest of Team 2 faints, leaving Ranma-chan as the sole team member conscious.] Teacher: How much do you wager? Ranma-chan: We're 50 behind, so... 51. Teacher: Answer - The date of Jesus Christ's birth. [Ranma-chan's jaw drops in amazement. Her teammates, fully conscious again, stare at her hard, causing her to shift uncomfortably in her seat. She begins to think quickly, trying to remember...] Ranma-chan: 4 B.C. er.. what is 4 B.C.? Teacher: Correct. Team 2 gets the 'A'. [Ranma-chan's teammates cheer and immediately carry her out of the classroom on their shoulders. Once outside, they set her down gently and crowd around her.] Teammate 1: I've never gotten an 'A' before! Domo arigato! Teammate 2: Me neither! You're the best! [looks Ranma-chan over] And damn cute! Let's go out! Teammate 3: Hey! I was going to ask her! Teammate 2: Get in line! Teammate 3: Why you... Ranma-chan: How about I ... uh... let you guys sort it out. I have to go! [Ranma-chan sneaks out between the guys and takes off running across the campus grounds.] * * * [Ranma-chan walks up the steps to Room 4 inside Maison Sabaku. As she reaches her apartment, the door opens and Akane almost runs into Ranma-chan.] Akane: Oh! There you are! Yuriko called. She said she's got one last part of the experiment, and then we're done. Ranma-chan: [making a face] Oh joy. Akane: [curious] What's the matter? Fail your finals? Ranma-chan: No... but the World History one was WEIRD. Akane: Well, tell me about it later. We've got to get over to Yuriko's. There's hot water on the stove if you want to change... unless you'd rather go as you are. Ranma-chan: [frowns] I don't think so. [Ranma-chan walks inside and heads for the kitchen. She takes the kettle of water with her into the bathroom. Ranma emerges presently, toweling his hair.] Ranma: So how long do you think this'll take? I have to study for Math tonight at Ucchan's. Akane: [sighs] It'll take however long it takes. [grabs his arm] C'mon, it'll be fun! [Ranma's eyes roll skyward as he closes the door behind himself. The two walk outside and head toward the Noumunoikan campus. After several minutes, Ranma starts looking behind every so often.] Akane: What's the matter? Ranma: Someone's following us. Akane: Nani? Ranma: Just keep walking, I think I can catch whoever it is. Akane: Hai... [Akane and Ranma walk around the corner, though Ranma holds back at the corner, waiting patiently. Soon enough...] Ranma: GOTCHA! Megami: AAA! HENTAI!! [*SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP POW*] Megami: Oh! Uncle Ranchan! Gomen! Akane: Megami-chan! [runs over] Where'd you come from? Megami: I went over to your house to see if you were home. Ukyou sent me to remind Ranma of his study time. [looks down at Ranma's unconscious body] Is he ok? Akane: [smiles] He'll be fine. We were headed over to my older sister's for ... ah... a little project her roommate is doing. Would you like to come along? We can wake him up there. Megami: [smiles broadly] Un! [The two each grab an arm and drag Ranma down the sidewalk.] * * * Kasumi: Here, try these smelling salts. [Kasumi opens one and sticks it under Ranma's nose. Ranma twitches, then awakens with a snort.] Ranma: Bleah! [looks around] Where am I? Yuriko: Good, he's awake! Let's get him upstairs so we can finish! Akane: [looking at Yuriko] Um... can't we wait a bit? He just barely regained consciousness! Yuriko: We-ll... Kasumi: Yuri-chan is worried because her instructor told her her project is due at 8:00pm today. Ranma: [blinks] Um... what time is it now? Megami: [brightly] It's 5:00pm! Akane: Oh. Ranma: [gets up slowly] All right... Akane: Hurry up! Let's go, c'mon! [pulls Ranma's arm] Megami: Can I watch? Kasumi: [to Megami] I don't think it's a good idea. The faster Yuri-chan finishes, the more time we'll have later. [Megami thinks about this for a while, then nods her head in agreement. Meanwhile, Ranma, Akane, and Yuriko head up to Yuriko's room/lab.] Yuriko: This part is really easy. [opens door] You'll sit back to back on the table here and I'll state something that you do or have a habit of doing. You have to tell me if you think your partner thinks it's "cool" or "not cool". This is why I asked you two those questions after our last session. [Ranma and Akane stare at the table, which has two seats strapped back to back on it. They look at each other, then back at the table. Then, shrugging, they climb into the chairs.] Ranma: Why do we have to sit back to back? Yuriko: So you can't see your partner's expression. Akane: [nods] That makes sense. [Yuriko sits in a chair facing the table with a small remote control.] Ranma: Um, another question... Yuriko: Sure. [smiles] Ranma: How will we know when it's our turn to be asked? Yuriko: Because you'll be facing me. Akane: But... [Yuriko presses the button, and the table swivels quickly to put Ranma and Yuriko face-to-face.] Ranma: ... Yuriko: Now then, here we go. Your agility. Ranma: Huh? Oh, um, cool. Yuriko: Right. [marks down] Your walk. Ranma: [confidently] Cool. Yuriko: Not cool. [marks down] Your quick reactions. Ranma: [blinks] Cool? Yuriko: Not cool. [marks down] Your hair. Ranma: [sighs] Not cool. Yuriko: Cool. [marks down] [Yuriko presses the button, and Akane swivels around.] Yuriko: Your smile. Akane: [blushes] Cool. Yuriko: Right. [marks down] Your temper. Akane: [frowns] Not cool. Yuriko: Right. [marks down] Your cooking. Akane: [begins to fume] Not cool. Yuriko: Cool. [marks down while Akane boggles] Your work ethic. Akane: [blinks] Cool? Yuriko: Right. [Yuriko presses the button, and Ranma swivels around.] Yuriko: Your persistence. Ranma: [ponders] Cool? Yuriko: Right. [marks down] Your clothing. Ranma: Cool. Yuriko: Right. [marks down] Your family. Ranma: Which half? Yuriko: Answer the question. Ranma: Um... [slowly] cool? Yuriko: Right. [marks down] [Yuriko presses the button, and Akane swivels around.] Yuriko: Your family. Akane: [sighs] Not cool. Yuriko: Cool. [marks down] Your generosity. Akane: Cool? Yuriko: Right. [marks down] Last one: your wedding dress. Akane: ... Yuriko: Akane? Akane: [whispering] Cool. Yuriko: Not cool. [Akane blinks, then turns around to glower at Ranma.] Yuriko: Just kidding... he said it was cool. [pauses] That just about does it. I need you both to sign your names here and here. [She hands the sheet to Akane, who signs it as if in a daze. Ranma scribbles his name after hers.] Akane: ... Yuriko: Arigato! You both have helped me out tremendously!! Megami: [opening door] Are you done yet? Yuriko: Hai. [smiles] We're done. [Yuriko moves over to a desk and turns on a computer. After a moment, she begins typing quickly.] Akane: [shakes head] Ranma, your "escort" is waiting. Ranma: [looks at Akane] Oi! What do you mean by that? Akane: [grins] Nothing. [Ranma is about to say something, when Megami grabs his arm and smiles at him.] Megami: C'mon! Ukyou is waiting for you! [tugs on his arm] Ranma: [sighs] Hai hai. [Kasumi enters the room as Ranma and Megami are leaving.] Kasumi: Did you... oh, I see you did. [to Ranma] Have fun studying. [Ranma makes a face as he is led downstairs.] Kasumi: [to Akane] Have you completed your finals yet? Akane: Two more to go, both are performance finals. Kasumi: [smiles] That's nice. Nabiki already bought our tickets for the train ride home. Akane: I'll tell Ranma, then. [to Yuriko] Good luck on your paper! [Yuriko only raises a hand and continues typing.] Kasumi: [whispering] She's always like this when she's on a deadline. [motions] Let's go downstairs. [Akane nods, and the two exit the room, closing the door softly behind them.] * * * [Ranma and Megami walk along the sidewalk toward Ukyou's apartment talking and laughing. After a while, the two fall silent, with Megami watching Ranma curiously.] Megami: How long have you known Ukyou? Ranma: [blinks] Um... well, since I was about... four or five, I guess. [scratches head] I don't really know. [pauses] Why do you ask? Megami: No reason. [continues walking] Ranma: I see. Megami: What do you think about her? Ranma: ... Megami: I'm only asking because I overheard some things... Ranma: Like...? Megami: Well... like she used to be your fiancee at one time? Ranma: [sighs] Yeah, that's true. Megami: But what about Akane-san? [Ranma stops short and looks at Megami quizzically.] Ranma: What do you mean? Megami: Well, wasn't she a fiancee of yours too? Ranma: [nods] Hai. Megami: How come you had more than one fiancee? Ranma: Well, it wasn't my choice, you see... Megami: [interrupts] Didn't you love Ukyou? Ranma: ... [Megami stares at Ranma, waiting for him to say something. Ranma looks at her for a long moment.] Ranma: Do I care about her the way I care about Akane? Is that what you mean? Megami: [nods] Un. Ranma: [pauses] No... not like that. Megami: But why then...? Ranma: [sighs] I'm not good with this stuff... Kasumi's always been better at explaining... Megami: Nani? Ranma: Look, I like Ukyou very much. I'm her friend, maybe even her best friend. We help each other out, like in school for example, and we care enough to look out for each other. Megami: What's the difference then? Ranma: [pauses] Well... you know when boys are friends they hang out together, look out for each other when they're in trouble, stuff like that? Megami: [flatly] No. Ranma: ... [Ranma thinks for a moment.] Ranma: Um... all right... [pauses] When a boy and a girl love each other... they'll do _anything_ for the other one. They'll spend most of their time together, and sometimes they'll get married and spend the rest of their lives together. Like Akane and me. Does that make any sense? Megami: [slowly nods] I think so. Ranma: Point is... there was a long time - and I think Ucchan still does a little, but don't _ever_ say anything or else I'll get in big trouble - there was a time when Ucchan liked me the way I like Akane. And me being the baka I am, I didn't figure it out 'til way later. In high school, I was a real jerk, letting her think I liked her the same way... [pauses] We ended up hurting each other a lot. Megami: Does that happen a lot? Ranma: Nani? Megami: Girls like boys and boys not liking them back. Ranma: [grins] More often than not, unfortunately. Megami: Does she know now? How you feel about Akane? Ranma: Ucchan? Hai. She understands, but she was really sad about it for a long, long time, which made me sad too. I mean, she has been and always will be one of my closest and best friends, and it hurts me to see her sad. [pauses] Especially when I'm the one that made her sad. [sighs] The point is, she knows. [Megami falls silent.] Ranma: [sighs] C'mon, let's hurry up to your place. I've got a feeling Ukyou's waiting for us. [smiles] [Ranma extends his hand, and Megami slowly takes it. Together they hurry off to Ukyou's apartment.] * * * [Ranma knocks at the door, while Megami stands off to the side, out of sight. Ukyou opens the door quickly.] Ukyou: [loudly] Where have you been young lady?! [sees Ranma] Oh! Ran-chan! Hi! Ranma: [smiles] Konbanwa Ucchan. [nods to Megami] Told ya. [Megami steps to the door, and Ukyou gives her a knowing look, as if to say "I'll get you later." Ranma and Megami enter the apartment grinning from ear to ear, leaving Ukyou to close the door, shaking her head.] Ranma: How much more do we have to cover? Ukyou: Just the last two chapters. You've got a good handle on the rest, ne? Ranma: Let's hope so. Megami: I'll get some tea. Ranma: Bring the pot. We're going to be here a while. [Ukyou nods agreement.] Megami: Hai! [Megami runs off to the kitchen. Meanwhile, Ukyou opens her book and gets out a notebook.] Ukyou: I think we can skip over section 2 and maybe section 5. Didn't he say section 6 was definitely going to be on the final? Ranma: That's next chapter. This chapter only has five sections. Ukyou: Oh, right. [sighs] You don't seem worried about this today. Ranma: Well, after having two finals today, this just doesn't seem as bad anymore. Ukyou: That's good to hear! [Megami returns with a tray of three cups and a steaming teapot.] Megami: Tea, anyone? Ukyou & Ranma: Hai! Hai! [Megami pours tea for everyone and sits back, sipping hers occasionally while watching the two.] Ukyou: Now, do you see how this formula applies to only certain cases? Ranma: [flatly] No. Ukyou: [sighs] Ranchan, look, it only works if you take the limit to infinity, then determine if the equation fits the parameters. Like this... [Ukyou makes some quick scribbles on her notebook and tosses it in Ranma's lap. Ranma raises an eyebrow, then compares Ukyou's newly written notes to his own.] Ranma: That's all it takes? Ukyou: [nods] Un. Ranma: [sips tea] How come it doesn't make any sense in class? Ukyou: That's because you never pay attention. [sticks tongue out] Ranma: I do so! Look at my notes! [He holds up his notebook and immediately Ukyou begins to giggle. Half the page is notes and sample equations, but the other half is made up of doodles of the teacher, several classmates, and what looks to be Kuno. Ranma, realizing the source of Ukyou's laughter, immediately flips the page. Unfortunately, it is a full-page drawing of a cartoonish Kuno stuck in quicksand, with Nabiki standing on his head. Ukyou laughs out loud, and Megami leans forward to get a better look. Ranma, however, turns bright red.] Megami: That's a neat drawing. Ukyou: Not harboring any feelings toward either of them, are you Ranchan? Ranma: [closes notebook defiantly] I'm going to get something to eat. [Ranma stomps off to the kitchen. Ukyou tries to control her giggling, while Megami takes further interest in searching through Ranma's notebook. At the same time, Makiko storms in through the front door.] Makiko: [loudly] I cannot believe the nerve of that girl! Ukyou: [in between giggles] What's wrong Maki-chan? [takes a sip of tea] Makiko: [angrily] That red-headed bitch! She was all over Lardizabal today, and he didn't do anything to stop her! In fact, he KNEW her! Megami: Who was she? Makiko: I dunno. Some chick named Saotome Ranko, I think. [Ukyou spits out her tea and begins to cough. Megami immediately tries to clean the table.] Ukyou: Saotome Ranko? Makiko: Yeah, I think that's what it was... anyway, it's not important. Just that Lard-chan could be so .. so... Megami: Insensitive? Makiko: Yeah! That's it! Insensitive! I mean, what kind of tramp would flirt with another woman's boyfriend? [Ranma walks in, eating a cookie.] Ukyou: [looking directly at Ranma] Yes, what kind of girl would do that? Ranma: Um.. uh.. did I miss something? Makiko: No, just talking about what kind of jerk this girl was earlier today, flirting with Lard-chan. Ukyou: Talk about bad taste... Makiko: [despairingly] Ukyou!! Ukyou: I meant for that ... girl... to be flirting with Lardizabal. Megami: [to Ukyou] Is it bad to flirt with other people's boyfriends? Ukyou: We-ll, sometimes it can get you into real trouble, even if you're just playing. Usually it hurts the people involved, only because they really love each other and are a little scared about how the other feels. The ones that don't mind are the ones that are comfortable enough with their... significant other... to know better. Makiko: Well, she was certainly rude. Ranma: Oi! Come on now... Makiko: [turns to Ranma] Nani? She was! Ranma: [low voice] How do you know she was the one that started it? Makiko: Were you there? No! I was! Ranma: ... Megami: Auntie Maki? Do you love Uncle Lardy? Makiko: ... um.. why do you ask? Megami: Because you're upset about this lady who flirted with Uncle Lardy. Makiko: I... he... er... [Ukyou smiles.] Ukyou: [gently] Lardizabal's not your Uncle, Megami-chan. [to Makiko] Besides, it's not like Lardizabal has a girlfriend to begin with. Makiko: NANI? Ukyou: [grins] Well, y'know, since you two are just friends... Makiko: [blushes] ... Ranma: Ucchan, do you think we could get back to studying now? Ukyou: Of course. [Ranma and Ukyou continue with their studying. Megami takes a long look at the two, then sighs, getting up and leaving the room. Makiko turns on the TV.] Makiko: [sighs] Is there anything good on tonight? Ukyou: [not looking up] I dunno. Check channel 15. TV: [cutting in] ... don't be left out! The celebration is on! Makiko: Hey, check it out! It's that place again! [Everyone watches the TV. Shampoo and Mousse, dressed in fine clothing, work in the background while a voice-over announces the address of the Nekohanten.] TV: This Friday night, the place to be is the Nekohanten Bar and Grill! No cover charge with college ID! Celebrate the end of finals! Ranma: "Bar and Grill"? Since when did the Nekohanten become a bar and grill? Ukyou: Hmm. I dunno. Must be some new marketing ploy. Shampoo must not have been doing great business after that movie to have to change that radically. Ranma: But wasn't she paid pretty well for it? Ukyou: I think so... but if you're closed for a long period of time, your regular customers won't return. [shrugs] I guess she must've lost money in the end. Makiko: Let's go there tomorrow night! Please? Megami: Can I come? Makiko: I dunno... do you think it's a good idea, Ukyou? [Ranma looks over at Ukyou, who shakes her head.] Ukyou: Megami's not THAT old, Maki-chan. [Megami looks crestfallen.] Ranma: Guess one of you will have to stay home and watch her then, ne? Ukyou: I'm not so sure... She's old enough to stay by herself though. [to Megami] What do you think about that? The whole place to yourself for the evening. Megami: [considering] Hmm... ok. As long as I get to stay up late. Makiko: Deal. [to Ranma] What about Akane? Ranma: I'll have to ask her. Makiko: [confidently] She'll go. Ukyou: You're sure about that? Makiko: Positive. Just leave it to me. [grins] * * * [Friday morning. Ranma is putting his notebooks and books in his backpack, as Akane emerges from the kitchen with a glass of orange juice.] Akane: Are you ready for your Math final today? Ranma: Hai. I'm not looking forward to it, but I guess I'm as ready as I'm going to get. [pauses] By the way, how do you feel about going out after you're done with your finals tonight... Akane: [interrupting] Really? Ranma: [sweat drops] ... with all our friends. Akane: [sighs] Sure, why not. Just remember we need to pack tonight and straighten up before going home. Ranma: [shrugs] No problem. We can do that afterward. Akane: So where're we going? No, wait, don't tell me... the Nekohanten. Ranma: How'd you know? Akane: Makiko called last night while you were on your way home. [smiles] But I wanted you to ask. Ranma: ... [There is a knock at the door. Ranma opens it to find several TV and newspaper reporters, along with photographers, cameramen, and several dozen miscellaneous people standing in the hallway. Ranma shakes his head.] Reporter 1: Is there a ... uh.. [looks down at a piece of paper] Saotome Ranma here. Ranma: Hai. Reporter 1: ... uh... could you tell me where I could find this person? Ranma: Hai. Reporter 1: [to his colleagues] This is the place! [A cheer goes up from everyone in the hall.] Toshi: [from down the hall] SHUT UP! LET AN OLD MAN REST!! Reporter 1: So... are you going to tell us? Ranma: Hai. [A long pause follows. The reporter sweat drops. The cameramen sweat drop. The people in the hall sweat drop. Ranma smiles innocently.] Ranma: Oh, you mean right this minute? Everyone in the hall: HAI! Toshi: [from down the hall] SHUT UP ALREADY! [Ranma walks through the door with Akane, and she locks the door behind them. The two walk downstairs.] Ranma: Gomen, but I can't. I have a final to take. [Everyone in the hall face-faults.] Toshi: [from down the hall] THAT'S IT! I'M CALLING THE POLICE! * * * [On campus, Ranma and Akane go their separate ways, Ranma heading for the Math building, while Akane heads toward the temporary Theater Arts Complex. On his way there, Ranma catches up with Ukyou.] Ranma: Nervous? Ukyou: Nope. You? Ranma: Nope. After what happened this morning, I'm ready for anything. Ukyou: What happened this morning? Ranma: Buncha reporters and TV people showed up at the door looking for me. Ukyou: What'd you say? What'd they want? Ranma: They wanted me, but didn't know who I was. I think it has to do with that sinkhole from yesterday. Ukyou: So that really _was_ you? [giggles] You sure got into a lot of trouble yesterday - first with Lardizabal, then this whole TV thing. Ranma: Um... it was the other way 'round... and what about this whole "TV thing" anyway? Ukyou: Oh, it was the top story last night. An "anonymous" female saved the lives of several people when a sinkhole opened up under the street. She took off before they could identify her, but they claimed to have found some ID of hers. The picture they showed on the ID was pretty bad, and the name and address were blanked out, but I thought it was a little familiar... Ranma: [snaps fingers] So _that's_ where my wallet went! Ukyou: [blinks] They stole your wallet? Ranma: [shakes head] I don't think so. It probably fell out at the scene. Ukyou: [nods] I see. Ranma: Well, anyway... [looks up at the building] Here we are. Any last words? Ukyou: [smiles] None worth saying. Ranma: Let's do it. * * * [Akane walks into the classroom. A temporary stage has been set up on one side of the room, and many of her classmates sit on the floor in front of it. Lardizabal, noticeably, sits off to the side, reading a manga.] Akane: Tanaka-san! [waves] Lardizabal: [looks up] Tendo-san! [grins] Akane: Are you ready for the final? Lardizabal: As ready as I'm going to get. Akane: [motions to manga] What're you reading? Lardizabal: [holds manga up] Something I picked up at the library. It's called "Marmalade Boy". It's pretty funny. Akane: [takes a look] "Marmalade Boy"? Sounds like shojo to me. Lardizabal: [turning red] Well, uh, y'know... Akane: [smiles] I'm sure it's interesting. [hands manga back] Anyway, do you know if Kimo-sensei is going to have us partner up or is it going to be soliloquys all around? Lardizabal: [shrugs] I dunno. I'm ready for either case, though. Akane: [sighs] Well, I'd at least like to know what to prepare for. [Kimo enters the room and everyone quiets down.] Kimo: All right, then. Today's performance is a choose-your-own-story. I'll let you choose any scene out of any play, BUT you must partner up with someone. Your partner is not going to be graded, only you. Akane: [whispers] Wow! This'll be great! [to Lardizabal] Will you partner up with me? Lardizabal: [whispers] Only if you do the same for me. Akane: [whispers] Deal. Kimo: All right... Saotome-san, you can go first. Pick your partner. Akane: [stands] Already have. [motions to Lardizabal, who stands] I'm going to perform a scene from _Taming of the Shrew_. [The entire classroom immediately backs away from the stage.] Akane: [smiles] Just kidding. How about _King Lear_ Act 4, scene 5? Kimo: Good choice. I assume that Tanaka-san is Oswald? Akane: Hai. [Lardizabal sighs, then steps up to the stage. Akane follows.] Kimo: Whenever you're ready. [Akane nods, then turns to face Lardizabal.] Akane: Lord Edmund spake not with your lord at home? Lardizabal: No, madam. Akane: What might import my sister's letter to him? Lardizabal: I know not, lady. Akane: Faith, he is posted hence on serious matter. [turns away] It was great folly, Gloucester's eyes being out, To let him live. [looks at the ground] Where he arrives he moves All hearts against us. Edmund, I think, is gone, In pity of his misery, to dispatch His nighted life; moreover, to descry The strength of the enemy. Lardizabal: I must needs after him, madam, with my letter. Akane: [faces Lardizabal] Our troops set forth tomorrow. [moves closers] Stay with us; The ways are dangerous. Lardizabal: I may not, madam: My lady charged my duty in this business. Akane: Why should she write to Edmund? [steps back] Might not you Transport her purposes by word? [pauses] Belike, Something - I know now what. I'll love thee much, Let me unseal the letter. [reaches for imaginary letter] Lardizabal: [pulls back] Madam, I had rather - Akane: I know your lady does not love her husband; I am sure of that; and at her late being here She gave strange amorous glances and most speaking looks To noble Edmund. [turns sideways] I know you are in her confidence. Kimo: Great, Saotome-san. [applauds] [The rest of the class claps politely. Akane and Lardizabal both smile and leave the stage quickly.] Kimo: Alright, Shakespeare's been done, so everyone else has to pick something else. [Several classmates shoot evil glares at Akane, who merely shrugs helplessly.] Kimo: Remember, your score is based on YOUR ability to portray the character, not on how you feed off your partners. All right? [looks around room] Yamada-san, you're next. [Akane sits down in the back with Lardizabal watching the rest of the performances.] * * * [At the Nekohanten that evening, the place is crowded to the point that it is almost standing-room only. Two hefty bouncers stand by the door surveying the people while Mousse rushes back and forth at the bar serving customers and Shampoo busily waits tables. The conversations are loud, and the music is louder - a typical college bar scene. Akane, Ranma, Ukyou, Nabiki, and Makiko all sit at a medium-sized table near the back, each with a drink in front of them - except Makiko, who has several empty glasses in front of her.] Ranma: [loudly] It wasn't that bad after all, ne Ucchan? Ukyou: [raises her glass] Right! We passed Math! We can do anything! Akane: [grins] You two did all right? Makiko: [loudly] You shoulda ssseeen them when they got h- *hic* home, Akane. They were jumping up and down and up and down and up and down an'... Ranma: [to Akane] I think she's had a bit too much to drink. Akane: I agree. Nabiki: I heard that you and Tanaka-san did pretty well in your finals too. [Ranma glances at Nabiki, then quickly looks over at Akane.] Akane: [smiles] It was nothing, really. Ranma: [mutters] When you don't have to study, that is. [Nabiki looks over at Ranma. Ranma pointedly ignores her, instead watching Shampoo as she hurries over to the table with an empty tray. She stops and takes a deep breath.] Shampoo: What you want to eat? Makiko: Where's Lard-chan? Shampoo: [points at bar] He getting drinks. You want food? Ukyou: Um... what's the special today? Shampoo: [grins] One special! [hurries off] Ukyou: No, wait... [sighs] What's the use. Ranma: Don't worry, it can't be THAT bad. The mummy's not here, remember? Shampoo can't go digging around in her spices. Nabiki: Father said she and the old geezer are due back next month sometime. Ranma: [mutters] Don't you ever have GOOD news...? [Akane elbows Ranma under the table as Lardizabal arrives with several drinks. Amazingly, he does not spill one drop even though he is rudely bumped and pushed the entire way back to the table.] Lardizabal: [setting drinks down] Ok, that's one Flaming Mousse for Ukyou, a Vodka Shampoo for Makiko, and a Cologne Special for me and Akane. Oh yeah, and an Amazon, straight up, for Ranma. Makiko: [slurs] What kinda drink izza Amazon? Ranma: [sips drink] Strong. Ukyou: Do you think Megami's ok? Akane: She'll be fine. She's probably watching TV right now... * * * [Megami, seated on the couch, flips through the channels on the TV. She stops when she sees a replay of the sinkhole incident the day before.] TV Announcer: ... and so the mysterious hero left, headed for the nearby campus. Unfortunately, we did not get the person on camera, but according to ID found at the scene, it is Saotome Ranma. This is the second time in less than four months that Saotome Ranma has made the news. If you remember back in April, Saotome and his wife broke up and captured the notorious crime-ring that had been burglarizing homes and robbing people near the Mizunoikan campus. It was also then that the mysterious red glow was seen in the district, the cause of which is still to be determined. If you have any information regarding the whereabouts of Saotome Ranma, give us a call at... [Megami turns down the volume as she begins to dial.] Megami: Moshi moshi! Hai! I was just watching your show... [pauses] Hai. [longer pause] Well, I know where _a_ Saotome Ranma is right now... * * * Akane: What IS this?? [Akane peers into the bowl. Finger-sized bits of food resembling miniature drumsticks covered in barbecue sauce fill it to the rim. The smell, while enticing, reeks of spice. Everyone at the table casts a questioning glance at Shampoo, who simply sets down another smaller bowl filled with a different sauce next to the first.] Shampoo: They buffalo wings. Ranma: Buffalo wings? Buffaloes don't have wings. [aside to Ukyou and Akane] Unless you count Taro... [pauses] Oi! Where'd you get these "wings" at? Shampoo: Special delivery. I cook special for customers tonight. You like? Ranma: And what's this white stuff with the blue specks in this other bowl? Shampoo: That blue cheese dressing. It give flavor to wings. Ukyou: [mutters to Akane] Remember what happened the last time she used spice... Akane: This doesn't have any ... weird spices on it, does it? Shampoo: [grins evilly] No, but if you want, Shampoo get some. [Akane and Shampoo exchange glares, then Shampoo walks off to serve some other customers. Lardizabal, salivating, grabs one and begins to eat. Seconds later, his face turns bright red, and he quickly downs his beer.] Makiko: [slurs] Whassa matter, Lard-chan? Lardizabal: Hot! [fans face] Hot! [Makiko slides close to Lardizabal and wraps her arms around him.] Makiko: Aww... my wittle Lard-chan burned himself? Lardizabal: [stammers] M- Maki-chan... [A gaggle of reporters, cameramen and other news-people enter the Nekohanten, forcing several nearby people into other booths, couples, and assorted furniture. Everyone at the table turns to watch the mob slowly converge on their table.] TV reporter: Excuse me! We're looking for Saotome Ranma. Have you seen her? [Ranma hangs his head. Nabiki smirks.] Ukyou: Why do you want Ra... er... Saotome-san? Cameraman: She's a hero! We need to interview her as soon as possible! Ukyou: ... Ranma: [to Nabiki] You had something to do with this, I'll bet. Nabiki: [shocked] Nani? I had nothing to do with it! Honest! Ranma: Sure. Whatever. Nabiki: Listen, you, I'm telling the truth. Maybe if you would actually get it through your thick head... Ranma: [interrupts] Kinda hard to believe from someone who's made a career of making money off of me. Nabiki: ... Akane: [softly] Ranma... stop it, please. [Everyone sits in silence as Ranma and Nabiki glare at each other.] Reporter: Anou... [Ranma turns to the reporter and sighs.] Ranma: [slowly] I'm Saotome Ranma. [All the TV reporters lean forward, then realize...] Reporter: You're not a girl! You're... [looks at ID picture] him. [The reporter takes a closer look at Ranma's ID, then back at Ranma. Those standing near him also do the same. Ranma sweatdrops uncomfortably.] Reporter: How come... Ranma: [interrupts] If you wouldn't mind, I'd like my ID back. [holds out hand] Reporter: But... Ranma: [interrupts] Now. [The reporter slowly hands Ranma his ID and wallet.] Reporter: What about ... Ranma: [interrupts] The girl is... um... my cousin Ranko. And no, I don't know where she is right now. I just let her borrow my wallet for a bit. Cameraman: Why would you let her borrow your wallet? Makiko: You KNOW that floozy?? Reporter: Floozy? I smell a scoop! [Everyone crowds around Makiko, who struggles to sit up straight. She gives up and leans on Lardizabal drunkenly.] Makiko: [slurs] That fffloozy tried to hit on my Lard-chan. [Ranma makes a twirling motion around his right ear, then points a thumb at Makiko and shrugs helplessly. Akane and Ukyou giggle.] Lardizabal: "Yours"? TV Reporter: A hero with a dark side! Wow! Makiko: She's such a bimbo... flaunting around like that! Girls like her are only supposed to come out at night! Ukyou: [gently] Maki-chan... [Ranma sits silently, his fists clenched under the table. Akane, meanwhile, is trying to keep from laughing out loud. Nabiki remains unusually silent the entire time.] Ranma: [to himself] I can't say anything... but if I don't say anything... Akane: Are you sure that the ... uh... girl was really hitting on Tanaka-san? Makiko: [slurs] Sssure I'm sssure... If I everrr see her again, I'm gonna... I'm gonna... I'm gonna... What're we talking bout again? [hangs her head, then picks it back up] Oh yeah... itsh gonna be messhy. [The reporters are busily taking notes, while the cameramen have the cameras recording Makiko's every move. Makiko looks up at one camera and smiles toothily.] Makiko: ... and I am SOOOOOO drunk, I have no idea what I'm shaying. [Everyone face-faults. Ranma breathes a long sigh of relief as Makiko passes out cold in Lardizabal's lap.] Lardizabal: [holding Makiko] Kawamura-san? [shakes her gently] Kawamura-san? Moshi moshi? Nabiki: I think it's about time for another round, what do you say? Ukyou: Chotto... I don't think I have any more money. I need to save some for the train ride home tomorrow. Nabiki: Don't worry... it's on me. Ranma: Why? What do you get out of it? Akane: [angrily] That's enough, Ranma! Nabiki: [casually] I get a beer out of it, that ok? Lardizabal: Let her buy the drinks already! [grins at Ranma] Unless YOU want to buy... Ranma: [glares at Lardizabal] Not for you... Ukyou: Oi! This is supposed to be a PARTY, not a fight! Enough already! Finals are OVER! Akane: Right! Lardizabal: I'll drink to that. Ranma: So will I. Nabiki: [calling out] Mousse! Mousse! Another round! [Mousse comes over with another round of drinks. Shampoo follows with several glasses of a slightly greenish liquid.] Shampoo: You try new mixed drink? Akane: It's... green. Lardizabal: Is it free? Shampoo: Hai. Lardizabal: [grinning] Sure! Shampoo: Akane try? Akane: I dunno... Shampoo: Shampoo can always give it to someone else less afraid. Akane: ... [Akane takes the drink wordlessly and looks at it for a long moment. Then she downs it completely. Everyone, including Lardizabal, watches expectantly.] Akane: [coughs] Smooth. [Lardizabal immediately downs his and looks at Shampoo pleadingly.] Lardizabal: [holds out glass] More? Shampoo: [smiles] Anyone else? Ranma? Lardizabal: If Ranma doesn't want his, I'll take it. Ranma: [raises eyebrow] I'll try it. [Ranma doesn't down his drink in one gulp. Instead, he takes a large sip and tries to swallow. His face turns a dark shade of red as he finally manages to swallow the liquid.] Ranma: [coughs] Not too bad. [Makiko suddenly sits up.] Makiko: [looking around the table] Where's my drink? Lardizabal: You already drank it. Makiko: Well, I want another one! I'm thirsty! Akane: Do you think that's a good idea? Makiko: I can hold my liquor! [looks at Akane] How about you? Akane: [sighs] Tell me again why I'm here? Ranma: Makiko convinced you to go. Akane: Oh, yes. I forgot. Ranma: [curiously] And just what DID she say that was so convincing, anyway? Akane: She told me that if I didn't go, she was going to come over afterwards and sing to me. Makiko: [turns to Akane] Nani? You want me to sing you a song now? Akane: ... Makiko: I know! Let's play Jan-ken-pon! [Everyone at the table looks at Makiko.] Makiko: Come on! I know you all know how to play! [Ranma and Akane look at each other. Lardizabal looks questioningly at Makiko. Ukyou and Nabiki shake their heads.] Makiko: Uso... [sighs] Ok, this is how we play... you bring up your fist to your chest, and then say "Okay." [Makiko demonstrates by bringing her fist up to her jaw too quickly, almost hitting herself.] Makiko: Then, you count to three. 1.. 2.. 3. [Makiko lays her palm flat on top of her other hand.] Makiko: If the other person makes a fist, you win. If they make a pair of scissors, [demonstrates with other hand] you lose. Scissors beats paper, paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, scissors beats paper, paper beats rock, rock beats... Nabiki: [interrupts] We get the point. Makiko: Good! It's a great way to settle arguments too! [looks at Nabiki] You and Ranma-kun should try it some time! [Nabiki and Ranma look at each other warily. As Nabiki and Ranma engage in a staring match, Akane looks back and forth between the two, finally resting her gaze on Ranma's unfinished drink. No one says anything for a long time, save Makiko's occasional hiccup, as everyone is focused on the pair of in-laws. Finally, Akane grabs Ranma's drink and downs it while no one is looking, accidentally bumping the table as she does so. At this, Makiko suddenly stands, breaking the tension.] Makiko: [holding stomach] Ulp... I think I need to ... *hic* use the ladies' room... [Makiko rushes from the table to the bathroom. Ukyou stands up as well.] Ukyou: I'd better check on her. Make sure she's okay... [Ukyou follows Makiko to the bathroom. Ranma looks at his empty glass, then sees Akane's guilty expression. He chuckles to himself, then pushes the empty glass away from himself.] Ranma: [calling out] Mousse! Another couple of specials please! Akane: [moves closer to Ranma] I was hoping you'd say that. Ranma: Why do you say that? Akane: Because I think that tonight I'm going to get drunk! [giggles] In fact, I don't think everyone's drunk enough! [Akane looks around the table, watching everyone's reaction. Slowly, everyone begins to smile back at Akane. She grins and looks back at Ranma.] Akane: What do you say? This is supposed to be a celebration, remember? Ranma: Um... sure, I guess. Nabiki: This _could_ get interesting... [Mousse returns with specials for everyone. Akane again quickly downs hers. Everyone watches with amusement. Lardizabal leans back in his chair.] Lardizabal: NOW this is starting to look like a party! =============================================================================== finis. =============================================================================== There's word on the street again The rumours come flyin' She's up to her old ways again And another one is cryin' No-one understands She's a dif'rent person now No-one lends a hand To listen to her now Days going by, hopelessness in your heart Never look back, never break apart Somebody loves you Now and forever And you're not alone now If only you'll remember That somebody loves you Waiting patiently Somebody loves you Look and you will see Somebody loves you ... (Somebody) Somebody like me. =============================================================================== Credits : Writers..............: David Tai Paul Gallegos John Walter Biles Jeffrey Paul Hosmer Story Artists........: Anastasia Moreno Jong Man Hwang DnR Outsider's FAQ...: Jon K. Hayashi Special Thanks to....: J. -and- The Tucson Animation Screening Society (TASS) And of course Rumiko Takahashi +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | Copyright (c) 1997 Digital Knight Communications | +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | "Ranma 1/2" and its characters Copyright (c) 1997 | | Viz Communications, Inc., Shogakukan, Kitty Animation | | and Rumiko Takahashi | +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ ===============================================================================